Welcome the year of

...diligence.
I was sad to see the "Year of Confidence" go because in all honesty, it had become a crutch. To be truly confident, I had to move on. So when I was thinking about what I wanted this year's word to be I had a lot of things go through my mind, but I kept going back to this idea of discipline and diligence. When I looked up the definition for diligence I knew immediately that that needed to be word. It simply said: careful and persistent work or effort.

I personally lack so much self-discipline and self-control. I rationalize. I choose to quit too soon if things get too hard, I give up if I know I'm not going to win and I will always come up with a reason why that chocolate bar is a good option.
But I think being diligent is such a solid juxtaposition with confidence because in my journey of finding a more confident Leslie I was living boldly and loud and challenging myself to say yeses and try new things! All good things, but now it is time for zeroing in on being careful and intentional. Focusing on what really matters in my day to day and what needs my attention. I still want to live boldly but I want to clear the margins that clutter my life. I want to form healthy habits and weed out the bad ones. I want to live better so I can do better.

It is funny because I thought of this word and a couple days later I was finishing up "Let's All be Brave" and Annie F. Downs writes one of her last chapters on "Rhythm" and she talks about discipline and how that in itself requires an element of bravery. It is that choice of still choosing to do the persistent hard thing. It is finding courage in not giving up, even when we are feeling more vulnerable then we can stand. It is the confidence that you are capable of carrying on and that there is something bigger at stake.

I still don't know what all this looks like but I'm ready to delve in. I have a feeling that this year is not necessarily going to be easy but I know that it will be for the better.

So 2015, I'm focusing on doing my job with excellence and not undermining small tasks. Eating better and working out more. Reading my Bible, journaling, devotionally and praying more faithfully. Being diligent in pressing into God and discovering more of who He is. I'm focusing on being intentional with friends and family and learning to love well. On sharing Christ's love and my testimony more readily. Even focusing on small habits like flossing. Focusing on budgeting and setting up a more self-sustaining/adult life style. Applying myself to school and homework. I'm focused on not giving up. Not getting discouraged. Not walking away. I want to learn the kind of confidence that is found in being diligent enough to stand my own ground...and I'm sure that I'll be surprised by what all will be required of me, but challenge accepted.

What are your New Year's words, focuses or goals? (feel free to comment below)